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How to win friends and influence people

By April 12, 2021August 24th, 2023David Fein

I’ve read hundreds of books on both personal and business development and somehow missed the incredible power of Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends and Influence People””.  I thought it was too old and too simple to pay attention too–big mistake!  These principles are simple, and it’s easy to miss their transformative power in our lives and businesses. Get, read and study this book!

What books have you found that have really had an impact on your life or business? Drop me a note and let me know, I’d be interested to hear your thoughts.

Here are the summary principles from the book “”How to Win Friends and Influence People””

BECOME A FRIENDLIER PERSON

  1. Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.
  2. Give honest, sincere appreciation.
  3. Arouse in the other person an eager want.
  4. Become genuinely interested in other people.
  5. Remember that a person’s name is to that person the most important sound in any language.
  6. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
  7. Talk in terms of the other person’s interest.
  8. Make the other person feel important – and do so sincerely.
  9. 10 The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.

WIN PEOPLE TO YOUR WAY OF THINKING

  1. Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, “”You’re wrong.””
  2. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
  3. Begin in a friendly way.
  4. Get the other person saying, “”Yes, yes”” immediately.
  5. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
  6. Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
  7. Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.
  8. Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.
  9. Appeal to the nobler motives.
  10. Dramatize your ideas.

BE A LEADER

  1. Throw down a challenge.
  2. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
  3. Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
  4. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
  5. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
  6. Let the other person save face.
  7. Praise the slightest and every improvement. Be “”lavish in your praise.””
  8. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
  9. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
  10. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.

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